Ok so it’s been a while since I’ve written a blog entry.
I’d like to blame the fact that I’ve been extraordinarily busy with projects (which is no lie, I totally have) but really there is no excuse for not taking 10min to write a cute little blog post.
Anyway this week inspired me to write something cause I’m getting excited. Urinating in public excited in fact, by the amazing movies that have been and are continuing to be released throughout the year of 2012. A year which I’ve affectionately called the “Go F*#K yourself reality, I’m busy watching movies” year.
Before I get to the extreme orgasm that is the second half of the year. Let me do a very quick “look back” at the first 6 months of 2012.
The wonderful thing about this year (as opposed to the pile of shit that was 2011) is that we have been blessed with such a wonderful mix of, not only big Hollywood blockbusters, but equally impressive indie films and also an Australian gem or two.
On the big budget blockbuster side of things we were blessed with the likes of Guy Ritchie’s second Sherlock Holmes film, Fincher’s version of The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo, Scorsese’s Hugo, a childhood favourite in The Muppets, the popular Hunger Games and also the epic Avengers movie. All solid films to kick off 2012.
In the indie corner (which is normally my favourite) we were graced with The Descendants, The Artist, Martha Marcy May Marlene (proving that not all Olsen sisters deserve a well placed headbutt to the face), the surprisingly brilliant 50/50, Shame (I saw this at 10am and got an early morning eyeful of Michael Fassbender’s golf club like penis), the star studded Carnage and the simple yet beautiful Like Crazy starring my new female actress obsession in Felicity Jones.
There was also the wonderful Coriolanus which marked the directorial debut of legendary British actor Ralph Fiennes. It’s not often that modern day adaptations of old mate Will Shakespeare’s works are brilliantly done (see Macbeth starring Sam Worthington and a long haired Mick Molloy for my point to be very solidly backed up). But Ralph Fiennes in his directorial debut does a cracking job in translating the story to modern times.
Now a trailer. Just to break up a touch of rambling.
With June rounding out the first 6 months of the year we also have Prometheus (which I’m seeing at IMAX tonight so excuse the erection) and also Take This Waltz which looks like another sleeper hit and another big tick in the Michelle Williams box. Take that as you will.
Of course for every win we had some big losses. Most of which made me want to stab my eyes out with a ball point pen or watch reality television on loop (yup, that bad.) I’m talking about A Few Best Men, John Carter (formerly John Carter from Mars… unfortunately changing the name doesn’t make it any less shit), A Dangerous Method, Battleship (starring an ex-model and a pop star and based on a childhood board game – I wonder what went wrong) and the film that made me want to kill either Johnny Depp or Tim Burton, the depressingly bad Dark Shadows.
“But Nick,” I hear you say. “Surely with all of the wonderful films from the start of the year, the second half of 2012 can’t get any better. And if it can why are you being such a greedy f*#k??”
My response to you dear sirs and ladies??
It is totally better and I can definitely be greedy because (as one of my film lecturers once said) there is NO time for shit movies. And I agree. So let’s look at the second mind blowing 6 months of 2012.
To begin with we have the American summer season which is normally littered with blockbusters. This year is no exception, with the release of (prepare yourself) The Amazing Spiderman (it’s got Emma Stone and Andrew Garfield in it so haters be damned), Seth Mcfarlane’s first foray into feature filmmaking in Ted (some of the animation was completed at Illoura in Melbourne – great work guys!!), a sweet looking Australian film called Not Suitable For Children (starring True Blood’s Ryan Kwanten – I’m hoping it’s just as good as the underrated Griff the Invisible which also starred Kwanten), the new Bourne film starring Jeremy Renner, Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter, Moonrise Kingdom (instant erection material and Cannes opening night film), The Expendables 2 (I have no choice but to see it as my dad looks like Schwarzenegger… also his name comes up on autocorrect which is all kinds of awesome), The Sapphires (another Australian gem that got a 15min standing ovation at Cannes) and of course, the mother of all blockbusters The Dark Knight Rises. It is literally the one trailer that I have seen in a cinema in recent years that has sound so loud the whole theatre shakes.
And you know what the f*#ked up thing is.
This literally only covers July and August. And in amongst all of that wonderfulness is the Melbourne International Film Festival which runs from August 2nd – 19th. What is a man to do?? So many movies, so little time.
To quickly touch on some of the other gems (and so not to waste any more of your time) we also have the next chapter in Peter Jackson’s obsession with hairy midgets in The Hobbit: Part 1, a cute little indie starring Paul Dano called Ruby Sparks, animated heaven in Paranorman from the people that brought you Coraline, Gangster Squad (I’d list the amazing cast but there are far too many exciting names to list), Les Miserables (if you’re into that) and to finish off my rant and longest orgasm of my life the BRAND SPANKING NEW Bond and Tarantino films.
Firstly, Bond is the one character I have wanted to play all my life. Ever since my brilliant Uncle Michael introduced them to me many years ago when I was just a little lad. Skyfall is the 23rd film in the Bond franchise and is in Academy Award winning hands with one of my favourite directors, Sam Mendes, at the helm and more Academy Award winning and nominated actors than you can poke a stick at including Judi Dench, Javier Bardem, Ralph Fiennes, Albert Finney and BAFTA award winners/nominees in Ben Whishaw and Daniel Craig.
Here is a trailer to get you a little more excited.
And then there was Tarantino. A man that never fails to amaze me with his enormous pair of testicles and the ability to continuously create cinematic gems.
I’d bang on more about him and his new film Django Unchained, but after seeing the trailer this morning – there be no banging needed.
So there you have it.
A particularly long rant about why 2012 is the very best year for movies. If 2013 can top this year I may just have a heart attack.
Keep an eye out for my MIFF preview coming up in the next few weeks, otherwise – see ya soon kids.